empathicfault | IC Inbox

Malcolm's reasoning hits home about Will's self-awareness. He knows the places Hannibal has grown into and wrapped around, the good and the bad. He had to, in order to know himself as more than just a product of Hannibal's whims.

He's quiet for a few long seconds, eyes unfocusing as he thinks over Malcolm's second observation. "Yes," he murmurs, then looks up to Malcolm. "No more sacrificing. Not from me. But I do like helping people. The ones that get overlooked, the lost, the...strays. Like me." He smiles, amused, because it's very damn obvious where that comes from. "And I also like making sure whoever willfully hurts them...that they see justice." Bloody justice. Maybe that's the problem? But would trying to stop himself there constitute a sacrifice? He'll have to think that over.

“That’s part of protecting them,” Malcolm says. “And that’s what we’re going to do. But. …Without getting ourselves killed.” He runs his fingers through Will’s hair, from his temple to the nape of his neck, then his fingers fidget there, with the curls that rest against his skin. “We have something else besides the mission to live for.”

Will shifts very slightly to stretch his neck out a bit and give Malcolm more space to play with his hair. The look on his face says that it feels blissful. Of course, that could be what he's hearing from Malcolm, too.

"We do," he says, voice deep and warm. "Isn't that amazing? It feels like a miracle." Will supposes he did die to get here, so maybe it is.

Malcolm grins at him and gives him another gentle kiss... and then another.

"It's the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me," he says earnestly.

Will leans up for yet another kiss, smiling all the while. "You do make me feel like I'm close to graduating. Just a couple more jigsaw pieces to slot into place...and then we can start putting our plans into action."

He feels considerably better, having more avenues to pursue and also some reasonable arguments against the things he was loathe to try. Maybe they really can both have this. Maybe they both really deserve it.

Fidgeting with a curl behind Will’s ear, Malcolm shifts his weight slightly, more a nervous gesture than anything, though he also still looks content, a smile lingering on his face.

“Will… I’ve been thinking. If I get another inmate after Kikimora? …I’m going to keep my deal and use it for something for us. For our future. When I promised my first two deals to my inmates… I couldn’t think of anything I would want them for anyway. I didn’t come here to get paid. But… this? Our plans? Our life together? When the time comes, I want to leave here with you and with everything we need to live exactly the life we want to have. I want that. So, I just… want you to know that I concretely am already working on giving up sacrificing myself to help people. I still want to help them, but… I want something for me too.” A beat. “That’s okay, right?” If you’re not an inmate, is it just selfish? After all the times he’s been told he may be acting selfishly in regards to Will, he retains some concerns about that. He hopes that’s overthinking it, though, because this decision feels… right.

It's difficult for Will not to interrupt this, because it's just so exciting and touching and- well, it's obvious on his face that he appreciates the idea. His own fingers squeeze loosely into Malcolm's back and by the time Malcolm finishes? Will is grinning.

"It's okay. It's more than okay, it's...good, for you to be compensated for your efforts. For you to be appreciated, by being given something you want. For you to know just how much you deserve to be happy. You- I feel that's a big step, for you." He leans up and places a few soft kisses on Malcolm's jawline and speaks quietly into his ear. "How does it feel, to talk about this out loud?"

Malcolm’s smile at Will’s endorsement gets even wider at the question.

“It feels like speaking the future into existence,” Malcolm tells him, turning his head just enough to nuzzle his cheek. “And… liberating. Like I can take your hand and go anywhere.”

"We're about one Deal away from that literally being true," he murmurs, happily. "And just my graduation away from asking Iris for a trip together. It'll be glorious."

He reaches up to touch Malcolm's face, running his fingers over the other man's temple. He moves slowly, softly- almost with worship. He can't imagine a better fate than intertwining his with Malcolm's, twisting them together to form a single golden thread.

Before he gets too distracted with his adoration, he realizes he should bring up one small word of caution. "Whoever you get for your next inmate'll be lucky. But if they hear that you gave your Deal to the past couple, they might want an explanation. Why they're different. What will you tell them?" His expression is encouraging. He's just trying to watch out for Malcolm's occasional blind spots. And he doesn't want Malcolm to feel discouraged for this decision- ever, if he can help it.

He lifts his head enough to look at Will's face, but not enough to dislodge his touch.

"I'll tell them that I'm different. That I'll put as much of myself into ensuring they graduate and that I won't abandon them, but that I... need to look after myself, too. I need to secure my future and theirs. ...Do you think I should preempt the question? Bring it up upfront?" he asks.

Will's smile turns almost playful at hearing that. It didn't seem to catch Malcolm off-guard, so that's encouraging. He shakes his head, almost imperceptibly, at Malcolm's question. "It might depend on who you end up with, but I don't think so. Let them ask, if they really want to know. And if so, maybe it'll eventually help, to know that you're practicing what you're preaching, eh?"

Will's fingers trail up to comb through Malcolm's hair. "We're going to have to start planning more concretely," he says, sounding delighted. "Like, what's the first Deal? The interdimensional houseboat, right?"

Malcolm nods seriously in agreement, turning his head to give Will’s wrist a stealth kiss as it moves alongside his face before looking at him again.

“If we end up with nothing else, deal-wise, we need that. That’s everything. So I guess we should get working more diligently on the design, so we’re ready for that,” he says, excitement ramping up in his voice as he talks. “I know you have what we already talked about stored up here,” he adds with a smile, touching Will’s temple gently. He saw it there.

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