empathicfault | IC Inbox

We had some philosophical differences, but he also pulled my ass out if the fire. He was a good big brother.

What do you mean you got him killed?

I got infected and bit him the next morning. It was like I didn't even know what I was doing. It...usually didn't happen that fast. The total loss of control.

[ Will leans his head back and closes his eyes, briefly. ]

He might've had some years left, but you know how Guardians are- were supposed to handle things.

Yeah. The Underground was pretty against it. So they killed you both?

No. Harkin got me out. But then I was seeing things and got away from him. Ended up with the- there was an infected group led by a man named Marcus. Killed and...infected people while invading the city.

[ He stops for a moment, thinks, and then lets the air out of his lungs in a rather more dramatic sigh. ]

One of the Guardians I killed is new around here, so- that's a new type of awkward I'd never expected.

I guess they got the crash course on how things go here. Who was it?

Dimitri. No idea if that's his name here, I've just seen him around. He was my commanding officer in the breach. I didn't like him much.

[ He considers leaving it there, taking a big sip of tea. ]

I ate his heart. It seemed...appropriate, at the time.

I can see that.

There will be more breaches. Do you think dealing with that is going to get easier or harder for you?

[ Will considers this. ]

I think....if the next one has something to do with cannibalism, I'm going to start taking it personally.

Can you tell me more about the previous breach? You said it was futuristic?

Yeah. It was a futuristic city. Some people were bounty hunters and, um, I know Thomas Blanky worked at a bar. And I think Raylan owned one? Pagan was a rich guy that threw fancy parties where I did fundraising for my free clinic. Neal was an artist who just found a patron.

That definitely sounds like more fun.

[ And it is appropriately distracting him away from his recent horrible actions. ]

Neal's your inmate, right? Not a temp one? Is he an artist here, too?

Yeah, he started as my temp and then they put us together permanently. He knows how to paint; he's been giving me lessons, but back home he was consulting on while collar crimes for the FBI as a CI. He was an art thief and forger before that, apparently.

Oh, an art thief. Much less gruesome than what we usually get into, but still exciting. -or at least, that's the little I've heard about it.

Sounds like it was a good breach for him too, if he found a patron in it. Did you help a lot of people, in your clinic?

Completely ungruesome. He was a true cat burglar, apparently.

I treated a ton of people. A lot of children. I also attended one of Pagan’s parties and guilted the rich into donating.

Careful. Around here, people might think you mean a literal cat.

[ He smiles, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes. ]

Please tell me you had the opportunity to cause a scene at the party, while you were guilting people.

[Malcolm laughs.]

No, apparently that me was very schmoozy.

Aw. Well, at least that was probably good for your clinic. You could help more people that way.

[ He looks a little wistful. ]

I hope I get something...nice, like that, for a breach. Maybe my brain won't be broken, one of these times, for example. Although coming back would probably be worse...

Edited (fixing sentences) 2023-03-24 01:51 (UTC)

It’s… disorienting, if it’s quiet in there, coming back to the… noise. Someone who… means well, but doesn’t know how brains work suggested I should use those sorts of experiences to show my brain what it’s like to be normal.

[ That gets a bitter laugh out of Will. He's had a lot of 'help' that 'means well.' ]

I'll try to be generous and think that they just meant you should try to...repattern your thoughts the same way or something. Like you could do it if you just had a map of the 'correct' way.

[Malcolm smiles wryly.]

I believe that’s what they meant, yeah. Like if I could feel what a normal brain is like on the inside, I would be able to adjust my brain until it feels that way, too. No luck with that so far, but quiet brain breaks: a double edged sword but enjoyable while they last, is my review.

Yeah, I don't know if that sounds a whole lot better. More convenient for the people around you, maybe. Less of a possibility of you looking rough for tabloid photos, but...harder to come out of when you don't have the experience handling these things?

[ Let him know, Malcolm. He's totally guessing, and that's clear in his tone. ]

It's a let-down. And it's rough, the every day stuff that you were used to before it.

[ He makes a bit of a face, not very pleased to hear about that, and then sighs. ]

Yeah, I imagine that would be quite the loss, once it's gone. Did you mourn it properly? Or was it more of an unwanted gift, doomed to be shoved into a drawer and forgotten?

Maybe somewhere in the middle. I missed it, and I tried not to dwell on it, but I don’t want to forget it, either.

Oh, well. That just sounds healthy.

[ He says it with mock-disappointment, but he does smile a bit. ]

At least you're giving me an example to follow.

I try to be a good friend. [He watches Will for a moment.] How have you been coping with the noise since we talked?

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