Will Graham (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
empathicfault) wrote2023-06-18 11:04 am
empathicfault) wrote2023-06-18 11:04 am
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[Open for text/audio/action/whatever.]
[Open for text/audio/action/whatever.]
The fact that Will is pleased with him makes him smile back.
“I always… conceive it in my head. That doesn’t bother me. I think it needs to feel at least a little real to test where the lines are,” Malcolm tells him.
“I always… conceive it in my head. That doesn’t bother me. I think it needs to feel at least a little real to test where the lines are,” Malcolm tells him.
Will nods in agreement. "I wasn't sure how much my experience translated over to yours, but I do understand. Thought I'd give you the easier mode, if that were an option." But they both always end up doing things the difficult way.
"Can I ask what it is you're conceiving of in your head, or do you want to wait until we're getting deeper into this?" Will is so so curious, but he knows this might be pushing. He'll back off the moment Malcolm seems uncomfortable.
"Can I ask what it is you're conceiving of in your head, or do you want to wait until we're getting deeper into this?" Will is so so curious, but he knows this might be pushing. He'll back off the moment Malcolm seems uncomfortable.
"I mean, apart from the murder I did, whenever I investigate a crime scene I always... imagine doing it, from the killer's perspective. Sort of... being the killer in my head helps me... see them," Malcolm explains.
Will gives Malcolm a much-more-often-seen eyeroll as Malcolm says 'the murder I did.' They've already gone over that. It is relevant in this context, but Will wishes he wouldn't put it that way.
The actual answer has Will brightening again. "That's how I do it, too. You step into their shoes and then you know what they did in what order. You see their design by putting it into action." Will tilts his head a bit. "-well...mental action. Do you- uh...do you practically black out when you imagine the murder, or is that one just me?" he adds, looking slightly sheepish.
The actual answer has Will brightening again. "That's how I do it, too. You step into their shoes and then you know what they did in what order. You see their design by putting it into action." Will tilts his head a bit. "-well...mental action. Do you- uh...do you practically black out when you imagine the murder, or is that one just me?" he adds, looking slightly sheepish.
"Oh... no. That's probably your empathy, actually. It's more like... I don't know. An emotional blueprint? I do... feel what they feel but... I usually know it's not mine," Malcolm explains.
Will breaks into a chuckle. "Yeah... there's a reason Jack had to clear out the CSIs when I got on the scene. It's basically a voluntary hallucination. Apparently I go stock still and jerk around."
He pauses, but there aren't any reassurances he has to make. Malcolm knows more about him than anyone. "So my way is a little more visceral, I suppose. The Enclosure might help make up for...some of that. Have there been times when your own interests or plans got in the way? Threw you off the trail?"
He pauses, but there aren't any reassurances he has to make. Malcolm knows more about him than anyone. "So my way is a little more visceral, I suppose. The Enclosure might help make up for...some of that. Have there been times when your own interests or plans got in the way? Threw you off the trail?"
"...There was one time I didn't see the killer at first - didn't even consider him - even though he was right in front of my face, because he reminded me of myself as a child. A nascent sadist. He'd been diagnosed with conduct disorder and he had a Jocasta mother. He stabbed his father over a hundred times. Is that the sort of thing you mean?"
So Shaw’s in a coma. Sorry about that, but… not to be mercenary and all… it might be a good day to. Um. Go to the Enclosure.
"...yeah, that sort of thing," Will replies quietly. "I...had that with Abigail, too. She...she stabbed a man. The brother of Cassie Boyle, the first murder victim of the copycat. I think it was...at least partially, an accident. Something Hannibal set up to make her desperate and dependent on him."
Will rubs his face. "I didn't see her there, I didn't know it was her until I saw Nick Boyle's body. And I couldn't refute her involvement anymore."
He sighs, reminding himself that Malcolm saved his target. "Okay, so I'm confident our methodologies are similar enough to be analogous. So the things I wish I'd tried before Hannibal dragged all that darkness out of me...maybe we'll try some of those."
Will rubs his face. "I didn't see her there, I didn't know it was her until I saw Nick Boyle's body. And I couldn't refute her involvement anymore."
He sighs, reminding himself that Malcolm saved his target. "Okay, so I'm confident our methodologies are similar enough to be analogous. So the things I wish I'd tried before Hannibal dragged all that darkness out of me...maybe we'll try some of those."
"Like what?" Malcolm asks curiously. "What did you want to try?"
[ Will's response is to laugh. ]
Yes, let's. That'll really cheer me up, I think.
[ A slightly odd response, but he knows Shaw will eventually watch this. When she's up again. ]
Meet you at the Enclosure?
Yes, let's. That'll really cheer me up, I think.
[ A slightly odd response, but he knows Shaw will eventually watch this. When she's up again. ]
Meet you at the Enclosure?
See you there!
[He practically runs. When he sees Will, his whole face lights up.]
[He practically runs. When he sees Will, his whole face lights up.]
"I'll start by giving you scenarios, and you'll have the task of planning out a killing of some sort. We'll run the gamut from extreme self-defense to various forms of active hunting. I'll ask you to give me a status update both before and after we run through the scenario, let me know your feelings." Far more easily done with Malcolm than most people, thankfully.
"We'll stop any time you need a break, and return to it when you feel ready. In that way, we can experiment and...define your darkness, not just assume it's the same as your father's."
"We'll stop any time you need a break, and return to it when you feel ready. In that way, we can experiment and...define your darkness, not just assume it's the same as your father's."
“So… if we define the edges and shape of my darkness… I’ll always know exactly where it is,” Malcolm surmises. He watches Will’s face as he adds “Do you think it’s possible to let it out and control it completely?” Was Will in complete control when he split Avalon’s head like a melon? Shaw thinks he lost control, but maybe he’s just letting her think that.
Will smiles a bit at that. "I know it's possible. That's what Hannibal...usually does. That's how it went with me and the Great Red Dragon." Not that he'd been convinced at the time, or he might not have dropped himself off a cliff. But having had more time to sit with the reality of his kill- or their kill, really, but his design- he knows it was under control. The situation wasn't, but his darkness was.
"It's more control, not less," he confesses, a hint of excitement in his tone. "It's you, being in charge of an entire situation, for once. Able to mete out whatever justice you deem right...that really appeals to me."
"It's more control, not less," he confesses, a hint of excitement in his tone. "It's you, being in charge of an entire situation, for once. Able to mete out whatever justice you deem right...that really appeals to me."
"Are... you going to be disappointed in me if we do all this work and.... and that justice isn't death?" Malcolm asks. He doesn't know yet what crossing the line looks like for him, but he doesn't want to lose Will if it's not what he expects.
Will blinks in confusion for a moment, then shakes his head. "No. No, that's not the point of this. I want you to figure out what you want. As you said...define the edges and shape of your darkness. Figure out what parts are you. And you can decide how much you want to indulge, from there. What I want doesn't enter into this particular exploration."
It’s true. Malcolm watches him say it and it’s true. He kisses Will tenderly and threads his fingertips through the hair above his ear.
“I think… I think you’re the only one who can make that feel… safe.”
“I think… I think you’re the only one who can make that feel… safe.”
Will kisses him back, smiling against Malcolm's lips. They were actually going to do this. And maybe it's insane to try and explore murder 'safely,' with options given to back out if desired. But it's not more insane than pretending for one's entire life. It's not more insane than manipulating someone over years into various forms of murder. This really feels like this will work for them.
Malcolm says that and Will grins so wide his eyes briefly shut. "I'm so glad. I want to be safe for you, whatever form that takes."
Malcolm says that and Will grins so wide his eyes briefly shut. "I'm so glad. I want to be safe for you, whatever form that takes."
[ Will doesn't wait long, either. He's on his way immediately, only pausing long enough to make sure Buster and Winston have everything they need. He jogs up the stairs to the upper deck and smiles back when he sees Malcolm. ]
Please tell me our luck continues, and no one's in there already.
[ He nods his head over to the Enclosure door. ]
Please tell me our luck continues, and no one's in there already.
[ He nods his head over to the Enclosure door. ]
"Do you think it will help you, too? With... knowing what's yours and what's his? Is it possible to still figure out what you want or... do you already know?" Malcolm asks curiously.
Edited 2023-10-30 17:18 (UTC)
It's completely free! [He points at it.] Does this door lock? [From the inside, he means. People must use it for.... personal stuff. And maybe it's not quite the couple's private business they're going in for, but a lock would be prudent in any case.
At any rate, he takes out his warden item - a small leather bound notebook - and opens it for them.]
At any rate, he takes out his warden item - a small leather bound notebook - and opens it for them.]
We'll bar it, if it doesn't.
[ Because yeah, they don't want people to come in for this one. He makes his way into the Enclosure and looks, then heads back out and steals a chair from the Lounge next door. He sets it against the door and smiles at Malcolm. ]
Just in case.
All right- [ He steps up to the console at the entrance, then pauses. ] This is a no-judgment zone, as of now. We're only exploring and experimenting. Before we start- do you have anything you want to try, or anything in particular you're looking forward to testing today?
[ Might as well set it up for Malcolm if he has any ideas on how he wants to do this. That could guide them. But Will has a plan if Malcolm's more open (or cautious). ]
[ Because yeah, they don't want people to come in for this one. He makes his way into the Enclosure and looks, then heads back out and steals a chair from the Lounge next door. He sets it against the door and smiles at Malcolm. ]
Just in case.
All right- [ He steps up to the console at the entrance, then pauses. ] This is a no-judgment zone, as of now. We're only exploring and experimenting. Before we start- do you have anything you want to try, or anything in particular you're looking forward to testing today?
[ Might as well set it up for Malcolm if he has any ideas on how he wants to do this. That could guide them. But Will has a plan if Malcolm's more open (or cautious). ]
I... don't actually have any idea where or how to start. If you know, you can set it up. Maybe I'll get ideas for later ones once I get the hang of what we're... doing.
[He trusts Will and he's open to the idea of understanding his own darkness to, essentially, bring it out of the dark. But he's avoided it so strenuously, he's not at all sure how to look at it. He's never tried to. He never foresaw ever trying to.]
[He trusts Will and he's open to the idea of understanding his own darkness to, essentially, bring it out of the dark. But he's avoided it so strenuously, he's not at all sure how to look at it. He's never tried to. He never foresaw ever trying to.]
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